Quotes

Rosetta Stone

“I ran into Rosetta Stone at the airport yesterday. Wanted to say hello, but didn’t know how to speak to her.” Steve Collins, 2014

My Life

“85% of my life is fiction.” Steve Collins, 2014

Zero Tolerance

“I have a zero tolerance policy on people who don’t tolerate anything.” Steve Collins, 2014

Those are the Rules

“Just because those are the rules, doesn’t necessarily make them the rules.” Steve Collins, 2014

God Gave Us

“God gave us 2 ears and 1 mouth so that we don’t look stupid, having 2 mouths and 1 ear and all.” Steve Collins,…

Solicitation

“I was arrested this evening for solicitation. SOLICITATION. take THAT all you former sales managers.” Steve Collins, 2014

Comcast

“That ironic moment when you realize that the Xfinity commercial is being pixelized on your Comcast signal.” Steve Collins, 2014